Forum concerning the apparent demise of manners and social etiquette in America. Has it occurred, is it now occurring? Why? What do YOU think? Please post your comments and suggestions. I thank you, D. S. Vanderbilt
What has happened to good manners and social etiquette in America? Why have manners seemingly disappeared? If so, why?
posted by D S Vanderbilt, Sc.D. @ 10:41 AM
Forum concerning the apparent demise of manners and social etiquette in America. Has it occurred, is it now occurring? Why? What do YOU think? Please post your comments and suggestions. I thank you, D. S. Vanderbilt
Mr. David S. Vanderbilt is 5th cousin to the famous Gloria Vanderbilt Cooper, great-granddaughter of "Commodore" Cornelius Vanderbilt and mother to CNN journalist Anderson Cooper, and fourth cousin to the late and noted social etiquette doyene, Amy Vanderbilt. D. S. Vanderbilt was born and raised near Princeton, NJ. He majored in astronomy, social sciences and geography at Rowan University and the University of Arizona. Mr. Vanderbilt resides in both Illinois and New Mexico.
5 Comments:
Is it really difficult to believe human territorial behavior? Here's why. The primal instincts of man and womankind are really no different in our contemporary society then it was during the early stages of human evolution. These territorial instincts exist within the animal species as well. The "hunter" and "provider" needs (particularly in males) guide today's men and women to stake claim in matters of property and rights. Combined with current feelings (or lack of) power or authority, our minds instictually have us defend and preserve what is (or thought to be) our's. When access to true power and authority seems absent, we tend to act out in ways to "convince" ourselves and others to shoe dominance. Women in contemporary times now have the ability (and opportunities) to exhibit the same behavior as men have historically. One could say this ability has been evident since women were given to right to vote. Obviously other political and social changes in American mores would seem to be a more reasonable cause.
Manners...definitely waning. We have become a a me-first society hellbent on instant gratification. Whatever it takes to satisfy my needs...it is my right to have my every wish granted. If that means denying or taking anything away from you...so be it and too bad for you. And we are not made to face consequences of actions. We can trace everything back to a rotten childhood, drug or alcohol addiction. Why learn a lesson if blame is just a few words away? We are self-indulgent fools.
This may sound silly, but I think computers have also contributed to the lack of manners. We have lost the ability to interact with others...to consider feelings...empathy. The world is just a few keystrokes away. We can be anonymous, isolated.
I agree. The emphasis on technology in our lifetime has distanced personal...face-to-face social interactions. The once romantic manner of interaction via penmanship gave corespondenta the ablity to "Paint" a verbal and mental picture from afar...the built-in delay of postal mail lent to heighten an emotional bond and tension, creating the so-called romance. Additionally, there is a proven relationship between the brain and the mechanical (hand-written) communication. Even the typewriter served a similar purpose- there was "time" to compose thoughts. Emails being electronic require rapid composition - keying and sending with near instantaneous result. The "clipped" language and dismissal of standard grammer was born from this speed of communication. There is simply no time to "visualize" the recipient. The "romance" has vanished.
It's just not in America.
True, but it is perhaps more evident in America. Here's why: the decline of good manners and, hence, the ascent of rudeness in America can be more easily investigated...even justified...by runaway technology, political/social events, and our evolution from being a homogeneous society to heterogeneous. These factors will be discussed in detail as this blog expands.
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